18 January 2010

Our sweet Evie girl lived 212 days from her conception to her death.

212 short but precious days.

212 days we will never forget.

212 days that will shape us forever.

212 days we sometimes wish so badly we could have back, if just for a moment.

212 gifts from her sovereign Father to her and to us.

We would say there were too few, but the truth is, there weren't. She lived not a day too many or a day too few. Our sovereign Lord ordained these days for her before the mountains were born and before He formed the seas.

Still, we ache for more. And, we ache to have those days back again. And we find comfort in the innumerable days we have ahead with her in paradise.

Tomorrow, by the grace of God, our precious baby Hazel will live her 212th day.

We will encounter the day in this pregnancy that we said goodbye to Evie Grace in that pregnancy.

It is a milestone.

It's a happy milestone. Perhaps a little bittersweet as we remember the events that unfolded in those days then.

But mostly, it's a day to celebrate God's gift to Hazel.

And so is day 213 and 214 and every single day that God gives to her.

These days are precious. Every one of them. And because we have tasted the grief that comes when the days stop, we are all the more aware of the sanctity of each day we and the ones that we love are given.

The Lord has blessed our family abundantly! Tomorrow, our Hazel will live her 212th day! And in total, He has given to Ryan, Oliver and me 21,211 days!

They're not just numbers. They're gifts! Like talents to be sown!

Teach us to number our days, oh Lord!
To give thanks to you for our daily gift of breath and to use it for your glory!

"Lord, you have been our dwelling place
throughout all generations.

Before the mountains were born
or you brought forth the earth and the world,
from everlasting to everlasting you are God.

You turn men back to dust,
saying, "Return to dust, O sons of men."

For a thousand years in your sight
are like a day that has just gone by,
or like a watch in the night.

You sweep men away in the sleep of death;
they are like the new grass of the morning-

though in the morning it springs up new,
by evening it is dry and withered.

We are consumed by your anger
and terrified by your indignation.

You have set our iniquities before you,
our secret sins in the light of your presence.

All our days pass away under your wrath;
we finish our years with a moan.

The length of our days is seventy years—
or eighty, if we have the strength;
yet their span is but trouble and sorrow,
for they quickly pass, and we fly away.

Who knows the power of your anger?
For your wrath is as great as the fear that is due you.

Teach us to number our days aright,
that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Relent, O LORD! How long will it be?
Have compassion on your servants.

Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love,
that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.

Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us,
for as many years as we have seen trouble.

May your deeds be shown to your servants,
your splendor to their children.

May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us;
establish the work of our hands for us—
yes, establish the work of our hands."
Psalm 90


Anonymous said...

This post left me breathless. Your words are so beautiful. Your daughters have a wonderful mother xxxx

SarahMerritt said...

Written so beautifuly.Those 212 days were truly a gift from God and so are all of our days!Happy 212 days Hazel! May there be many many many more!

Chelsa said...

what a great post!

days/weeks/numbers/life is on my mind today as well. we said good-bye to andon at 34 weeks and 1 day. today i am 34 weeks and 1 day. and i sit here and marvel at the fact of how healthy i am this time around and that i'm feeling corbin kicking me as i type this.

praise the Good Lord for giving us our second children (that we got to meet only after they went to be with him) and for our 3rd children who are happily growing in our bellies.

Tracy said...

I'm so glad that Hazel will be sharing her 212 day with you guys. I know that its bitersweet, too, though.

Michelle said...

Well said! Thanks for sharing in such and honest and open way.

Sarah Robbins said...

Thank you for the reminder of the God I love, and precisely why I love him (one of the million reasons). I will be thinking and praying on this special day. . .

Sarah said...

All I can say is Awesome. God is just awesome.

Brittanie said...

So beautiful. When I hit that "day" with my latest pregnancy (didn't with my middle pregnancy, we induced the day before), I was a mixture of overjoyed and terrified. Terrified I'd wake up to no movement again. Overjoyed at every kick that day and every thereafter.

Today is 212, and I hope that it is a day of rejoicing for you, more than fear. (hugs) I hope you feel Evie close to you, because I know she is there.

Your Groovy said...

A beautiful tribute to an even more beautiful child. We will never forget you, Evie Grace Myers

:) Miranda said...

I have just fallen in love with your blog, you are an amazing inspiration to all Christians out there.

Mr. Nordmann said...

We learned that we are having our second boy in June. While it is easy to look forward and anticipate his arrival, we remind ourselves daily that we need to drink in those precious moments and celebrate milestones that we pass along the way. Such a beautiful journey...enjoy it!

The Bilslands said...

Your faith is inspiring... One of the ladies at Bloom gave me your link, and I was in tears within a few minutes. We lost our daughter Evie under very similar circumstances. Thankfully God has carried us through it all =)

I gave you an award in my last post, you have such a faithful attitude!